The 10 most important pieces of advice every new father should follow to be a highly successful dad

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I have been a dad for 9 months now and I have learned so much. I decided to compile a list of what I believe are the 10  most important pieces of advice every new father should follow in order to be a highly successful dad. Of course it takes more than 10 pieces of advice so if I missed any good ones feel free to leave them in the comments!

  1. BE THERE

Step one. It is the most basic step, and the most life defining step for your child (More on this later).  I am not saying you have to stay with the baby’s mother, or even like her. I’m not saying you have to live in the same house as her. I understand that things happen, babies are conceived on accident all the time.

WHAT I AM SAYING is that like it or not, you as a man are now responsible for doing everything in your power to give this child the best possible chance at a successful life. Nothing else matters. Your past decisions do not matter. This baby is your clean slate, your fresh start to really do something you can be proud of, and that something is being a great father to this baby who needs you.

Earlier I said this step is the most “Life Defining” step for your child

Let me drop some statistics on you:

43% of United States children live a life without their biological father

90% of Runaway children are from fatherless homes

71% of pregnant teenagers are from fatherless homes

80% of convicted rapists are from fatherless homes

63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes

71% of high school dropouts are from fatherless homes

85% of youths in prison are from fatherless homes

Some of you guys out there reading this may not think they have much to offer a baby or a child. You may justify abandoning your baby by convincing yourself that the baby is better off without you. I’m here to tell you that YOU ARE WRONG.  Read the statistics above again if you need to. Suck it up and realize that your life is no longer all about you, and whatever it takes, BE THERE for that baby.

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  1. Make eye contact and smile with your baby as often as possible

In my experience this is the number one way to bond with your baby from the very beginning. They are soaking up everything that they see, and every feeling that they have. Making eye contact with them will let them know that they can trust you, and I also believe they will remember your eyes and they will get to know you faster. For example I have bright blue eyes so i’m pretty sure my girl knows its me when she looks at them. Smiling at your baby as often as possible will provide a sense of comfort for them. Our baby is only 8 months old but she already associates smiles with love and fun. Let your baby know how much you love it by always smiling around it. “ABS”- Always Be Smiling!

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  1. Realize that your life has changed and will never be the same, but it’s worth it

Listen up guys. The days of living for yourself are over. No more spending hours and hours playing video games, watching football games while getting drunk with your friends, going out to bars or clubs, binging on hours of netflix, or going to poker night twice a week. You are a family man now!

That’s not to say that you shouldn’t still be able to do the things you enjoy because you should!

BUT The first 3-6 months are going to be the hardest so as a man you need to be around as much as possible to give your baby’s mom all the help and emotional support she needs. Especially if she is breastfeeding as this is extremely physically and emotionally demanding on a woman.  As new parents it is going to take you a good amount of time to get everything figured out. Once you and your baby’s mom get in to a good routine you can slowly begin to do the things you used to enjoy every once in a while, but being home with your family should still be your top priority!

I won’t lie to you it’s going to be a tough transition from doing whatever you want whenever you want, but I can promise you the love you will get from that baby boy or girl makes it all worth it.

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  1. Put your family before yourself ALWAYS

As a father your priorities are now in this order, and it is non negotiable.

  1. Make sure your son or daughters needs are met
  2. Make sure your wife, girlfriend, or baby mamas needs are met
  3. You can have something for yourself when the people listed above are taken care of

Let me give an example to further clarify my point.

Let’s pretend you are a Cleveland Browns fan (I know it hurts already) and somehow the Browns made it to the Super Bowl! You are so excited to watch the game! You sit down with your snacks and a beer. The Browns kick off and the game is underway! Suddenly you hear that cry, not the regular cry, but the blood curdling scream. Your wife screams your name to come help because she needs a break. She is stressed out, crying, her nipples hurt, she hasn’t eaten in 16 hours. Believe me this is real life stuff i’m not making it up! This is your big moment. As excited as you are that the Browns made the Super bowl, which has never happened before and will probably never happen again, your family needs you. In this situation you are going to need to put the beer and snacks down, go be there for your family, and possibly have to miss some or all of the game.

Will anything this extreme really happen to you? Probably not. I think we all know the Cleveland Browns will never get to the Super Bowl anyway.

The point here is that as a man and a father there will be times when you have to make some real sacrifices for the good of your family. There will be moments when you have to miss out on something you really want to do, because your family needs you. You may have to sell your motorcycle or sports car for something more family friendly, miss the fantasy football draft in Vegas with all your friends, or maybe even get a second job to make sure your family can afford everything that they need.

When these hard times come along and you are bummed out about missing out on something in order to provide for your family just remember one thing. You should be proud that you are the kind of father who puts his family first, and your child is going to grow up to be a happy and successful human being because of the sacrifices that you are making for them!

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  1. Get ready to see some things that might frighten you

Who here is squeamish? If you have read any of my previous writing you know that I certainly am. From the first visits to the gynecologist to the labor process to the birth to the breastfeeding. You are going to see some things that you can’t unsee.

I don’t want to ruin the wonderful surprises for anyone so I wont get into any of the disturbing details of the things you will see, but here are some clues. You are going to experience needles and blood, a whole lot of needles and blood. You will see your ladys hoo-ha take a whole new shape and size, and the nipples, oh how they grow. Those baby’s sure know how to stretch a nipple out while they feed, but don’t worry they will go back to their original size. If the nipple gets cracked or infected you are in for a real treat. Don’t feel like waiting to see what I mean? Google it! I dare you!

If your girl ends up having a C-section I would recommend not looking. I made sure keep my eyes down as I walked in to the operating room because I knew if I saw it I would pass out. From what I understand they take the majority of your girls organs and intestines out of her stomach and set them on the table next to her in order to get the baby out. Fun stuff right? Oh and the poop. POOP POOP POOP. I don’t know how so much poop can come out of such a tiny little creature.

If you are squeamish like me there is one piece of advice I can give you. Act tough, and pretend it doesn’t bother you. Eventually you can really trick yourself in to believing you aren’t phased, and you will be ok I promise. I am as squeamish as they come if I can get through these things so can you. I am after all, the guy who literally passed out while watching his wife give blood!

  1. Treat your child’s mother with respect

It’s pretty simple advice right? I said TREAT YOUR CHILD’S MOTHER WITH RESPECT. I did not say treat your wife with respect. I did not say treat your girlfriend with respect. I said TREAT YOUR CHILD’S MOTHER WITH RESPECT.

This means that the following men are all included in my statement:

Happily married men, divorced men, boyfriends, ex boyfriends, one night stand accidental dads, dads who were cheated on, full time dads, joint custody dads, dads who love their baby momma, dads who hate their baby momma, dads who are angry they have to pay child support, dads who think their baby momma is a loser, dads who think their baby’s mom is a lazy deadbeat mooch….Do you guys see the pattern yet? NO DAD IS EXEMPT FROM BEING RESPECTFUL TO HIS CHILD’S MOTHER

You do not have to LIKE your baby’s mother, but you do have to show her a level of respect for the good of the child that you have together.

There are two types of disrespectful situations that I see all the time by men directed at their baby’s mother that are just 100 percent completely unacceptable. This disrespect whether you know it or not is mentally and emotionally breaking your child, and it needs to stop. If you are someone who does one or both of these things below you really need to evaluate your choices and think about how they are affecting your child or children.

Situation number one: Being emotionally abusive to your child’s mother in front of your child. Things like name calling, belittling her, making her feel stupid or less adequate, bossing her around, the list could go on. From infants to toddlers to teens to adults, they see and  understand way more than you will ever know. I can promise if you are being emotionally abusive in front of them they see it and understand it.

They will not only resent you for it but they will begin to mimic your behavior. You will see it in their behavior at home, school, and eventually in their adult relationships. Is it really fair to your child to raise them in an environment like this?

Situation number two: Talking bad about your child’s mother to your child, when the child’s mother is not around. I see this all the time, mostly in couples that are broken up. Each parent wants the child to think that they are the good parent, and the other one is a bad parent, so they attack each others character to the child behind the other parents back. As much as you do not like your child’s mother you should never involve the child. It’s called being a mature adult for the good of your kid. A child should never be told bad things about one parent in order to influence it to like the other parent more.

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  1. Be mentally strong

I am not going to lie to you, being a parent is harder than you could ever imagine. When it’s 3 am and that baby is screaming bloody murder in your face the following thought is going to cross your mind “ What have I done, I have ruined my life”, and you are going to have the immediate urge to hand the baby back to your baby’s mom and go hide in another room. It is in high stress difficult situations like these that you need to be mentally strong. Remember that your baby’s mom needs the break way more than you do. We as men are competitive by nature. I suggest taking situations like these and turning them into a personal challenge. Make a challenge with yourself that no matter how hard the baby screams or cries you are going to rock her or walk her until she falls asleep. Tell your baby’s mom she can go sleep in another room and you will handle it. I promise if you do this your baby’s mom will have a huge amount of love and respect for you as a man and a father.

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  1. Listen politely to advice from others, but make your own parenting decisions

In today’s world everybody’s an expert on everything. Let me rephrase that. In today’s world everyone “thinks” they are an expert on everything. Everyone also thinks that their opinion is correct, and is the only one that matters. Parents, brothers, sisters, friends, and even your baby’s pediatrician are all going to have their own opinions on some controversial parenting topics, and it is fine to hear their opinions. When listening to outside opinions just remember, this is your baby not theirs. You are the person responsible for making sure that this child grows to be a kind, loving, and respectful human being.

Similar to the head Coach of a sports team you and your baby’s mom will be credited with the wins and blamed for the losses. If the baby turns into a great kid you will be praised for what a great job you did, and if the baby turns out to be a little devil, you will be talked about behind your back about what bad parents you are.

So when there is a difficult topic and you aren’t sure what to do I urge you to do the following:

-Ask advice and opinions from anyone who’s opinion that you respect and would like to hear

-Sit down with your baby’s mom and talk it out

-Make the final decision on how to move forward

-Stand behind that decision and do not care what anyone else thinks from that point on

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  1. Understand that money is important to a family, but your time is the only thing that matters to your child

Let me start by saying I LOVE MONEY. Trust me I am not sitting here telling you to quit your job and be a broke bum. Money is extremely important. It will lead to a better quality of life and more opportunities for your child’s future, BUT your time is way more important. I’m going to tell a quick true story from my life and maybe it will inspire you and prove the point I am trying to make here.

I graduated from college in Ohio with a bachelor’s degree in business with a minor in consumer marketing. I had always imagined myself being a wealthy businessman. Right after graduation my girlfriend and I decided to move to a small beach town in Florida. We had both always wanted to move south, and we figured this was going to be our only opportunity before we started putting down roots. My girlfriend (now my wife by the way) got a job via phone interview to teach at a great school here, and we took that as our sign. I eventually landed at a large online travel agency called bookit.com. At first it was a pretty awesome job and I was happy. The pay was good, I took business trips to Cancun and Orlando, I got to work from home, I got a free ipad, iphone, and laptop. I was only 23 years old and I was quickly climbing the corporate ladder and becoming the big shot that I always wanted to be. However I quickly learned that all of the money and perks came with a price.

My phone rang off the hook 24/7. I was always on call. I had no time left to spend with my wife or friends, and I quickly became very unhappy. Even on weekends when I was supposed to be off I was still expected to work. Issues would come up all the time and I would literally have to leave the beach to go home and make adjustments to the website or meet a client for lunch etc. I think it was the time that I was forced to work on Christmas Day that I decided I had enough of this “businessman” life.

I began to think about what would make me the happiest, and I realized it was right in front of me the whole time. As I said my wife was a teacher. Not only did she love her job, but she had so much time off to do anything she wanted with. I figured out a way that I could have time AND money. I still wanted to be a businessman, but I realized that I did not want to be a businessman that made someone else rich. I wanted to either own my own business, or not work in business at all. I realized that becoming a PE teacher, although it was a pay cut, would allow me to have a job I loved, along with a decent base salary, plenty of time to start my own business, as well as time for friends and family.

I am obviously not telling all of you guys to go out and become teachers. That was my path and it worked for me, but I promise you there is a path for everyone. No dad should be stuck working way too many hours in a job they hate for not enough money. If this is you I would suggest trying to figure something else out so that more time can be spent at home with your family. Just to name a few real ways to make money on your own time…Become an Uber driver, start doing Ebay resell, rent out a spare room in your house or apt, figure out what you are good at and do 1 on 1 training for kids or adults, start a grocery pick up and delivery service, mow lawns, start a debris haul off business with your truck.

The list could go on forever.

Dads: In today’s day and age there is so much money to be made there is really no excuse for you to be stuck in a job you hate for 50 hours a week instead of home with your family. I mean c’mon you can literally learn how to do anything on Youtube. It will take hard work but anyone can do it, and it is worth it to put in the extra work for your child.

If you would like to make a change but aren’t sure what to do please feel free to shoot me a message or email. I would be happy to talk with you and try to help you figure out what your best option is!

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  1. Remember that every single decision you make in your life from this point forward will affect your child

When men are young they all think they are invincible. It’s just in our nature.  I would say guys between the ages of 15-29 really very rarely stop and think about what the consequences or risks associated with their actions and choices will be. Guys are generally wired to just just act now and think about it later.

In high school and college my friends and I did some INSANE things. I mean some really really stupid things that could have ended very badly. Luckily for me they didn’t and I am still here today writing this. I think a large percent of the male gender would say the same if asked. Go ask your significant other if he used to do crazy and downright STUPID things with his friends. 90% of them will say yes.

My point here guys is that no matter what your age is those days need to end for you right this second. As I stated earlier your life no longer belongs to you. There is a little one depending on you now to be there for them as long as you can. If you are in jail or dead because you wrapped your car around a tree driving home from a friends late one night, then there is a great chance your child will end up as one of the statistics at the beginning of this article.

Don’t do that do your child. Do everything in your power to make smart decisions for that kid.

Now that  you have a child you need to ask yourself before every decision that you make “Will this benefit or hurt my child’s future”?

That was my top 10 pieces of advice for new dads what did I miss?

Comment below what you think the best advice for new dads is!

Make sure to tag a dad and share!

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Thanks for reading!

~Sean Robinson

Baby’s First Poop- This Sh*t Just Got Real!

I had a feeling that morning that the baby was coming. I swear It was the strangest thing. Lila wasn’t due for another two weeks, but I vividly remember waking up that morning with the weirdest feeling. Nicole was at work and I was home on summer break (I’m a teacher and she recently became a Guidance counselor.) I remember waking up super emotional which is not like me at all. Without any indication that my intuition was correct, I packed my overnight bag that morning because somehow I just knew that today was the day. Sure enough I get a call around noon from Nicole. She was calm as a cucumber. She told me “I think my water just broke” as she was driving home from work. We weren’t positive, but we decided to make the trip to the hospital just in case. Even with all this excitement It wasn’t real to me yet.

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The hospital told us we were in fact going to have our baby two weeks early. They started running a bunch of tests and getting Nicole ready to give birth. If you have read any of my previous blog posts you know that I am extremely squeamish around needles, blood, and really anything that takes place inside of a hospital so needless to say, I was very nervous…BUT being a dad still wasn’t real to me yet.

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We are going to Fast forward 17 hours through all the grueling details of the labor process, but I will say that I learned that day that my wife is literally the toughest most fearless human being on earth, and for those of you wondering, you will be proud to know I remained conscious through the entire labor process and birth. So our beautiful baby Lila has finally joined us in this world. She is a perfect 7 pounds 9 ounces with brown hair and beautiful bright blue eyes that she got from yours truly, her handsome father. After all this I STILL was not fully aware what being a dad was all about, and it didn’t feel real to me yet.

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Eventually the whirlwind of craziness slowed down and it was just the three of us alone in our recovery room. Just when I think I am finally going to get some sleep I hear the loudest fart that I have heard… EVER. We looked at each other in shock, realizing that this massive earthquake of an air biscuit came from our sweet little 7-pound 9-ounce baby. And then the dreaded words came. “I think you need to check her diaper.” Nicole was still recovering and was not able to get out of bed much in the three days following the birth, so the honor of the first diaper change was all mine.

Keep in mind that I had literally never changed a diaper in my life. I didn’t have the first clue how to change a diaper at all, let alone efficiently. I walked over to the baby with my supplies in hand: A full package of butt wipes, a towel to lay her on, a teeny tiny little diaper, and 3 wash cloths (I’m not sure why I grabbed those). I grasped the first tab on her diaper and began to peel it off. It crackled at me menacingly just daring me to pull the second one off. I proceeded with caution, and peeled the second tab off ever so carefully. Now for the moment of truth. I pulled the top of the diaper back from her stomach down to the bed and OH MY GOD WHAT IS THAT!! This was not poop. This was not something that I knew could ever come out of a human being, this was tar. Imagine the darkest color you have ever seen. Like when it’s so dark you can put your hand right in front of your eyes and not even see it. That’s when I knew that This SH*T Just Got Real!

I began wiping and I was doing a horrible job. There was tar everywhere, I felt like I was making matters worse instead of better. I hadn’t slept in over 24 hours, I was tired, I was irritable, I began to panic, I needed help. Luckily the nurse walked in. I asked her to help and she was so mean to me about it. I was shocked by her response. She acted like I was an Idiot for going through an entire pack of wipes and 3 wash clothes for one diaper change. Maybe I was, but like I said I was new at this!

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She reluctantly walked me through how to properly clean a baby, and I actually learned a lot from her, even though I felt she was extremely rude, and should have showed some sympathy in regards to my first time dad ignorance.

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These days I can change a poopy diaper blindfolded in under 30 seconds with one hand tied behind my back.

 

If only that mean old nurse could see me now!

 

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Thanks for reading!

~Sean Robinson

A Final Letter to Our Best Friend

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I sit here writing this to you with a heart that is absolutely broken. The tears will not stop coming. Every time I think I am going to be ok I walk by the window and see your little grave in the back yard and lose it all over again. We want you to know that we would give anything to get to hug and snuggle you just one more time. You were our best friend for 10 years, our first baby.

 

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Anyone who ever met you knows you weren’t the easiest dog to live with at times. With your OCD personality, constant honking when you wanted something, and need to be on our laps 24/7, but we would give anything to hear that honk again. That honking was something we thought was so annoying at the time, but now the silence in our house without it is unbearable.

 

 

You loved car rides, golf cart rides, swimming, the beach, EATING, but more than anything you just wanted to be with us. You loved us more than life. You were the most loving snuggly cuddly dog in the entire world. You had so much love in your heart. You got an X-ray once and the doctor literally told us you had an enlarged heart. I don’t know how we are ever going to be able to move on with our everyday lives without you. You have been by our side 24/7 for the last ten years. You will remain in our hearts and our conversations until we get to join you in heaven.

 

 

 

 

We are so happy that you got to spend some time with Lila before you passed away. Nobody could make her laugh like you. You were so good with her. You accepted her as part of the family from day one and made it your mission to protect her and make sure she was ok. We want to apologize to you for anytime we got frustrated with you or too busy to show you enough attention and love. Humans tend to get busy and caught up with things in life, only to find out later that they were putting all their time and energy in to things that weren’t even important. If humans were more like you the world would be a perfect place. It would be a place full of love where people put others needs ahead of their own.

 

 

 

 

We know you have had health issues for many years and we thank you so much for fighting so hard to stay with us as long as you did. You were absolutely the toughest little boy. You never cried when you got shots, or sand spurs, or even when you had to go to the vet when you couldn’t breathe all those times. We will cherish all the great years we got to have with you forever.

 

 

 

Please know that you have always meant the world to us and we will never forget you.

Rest in Peace Oliver Bartlebee Robinson We will love you forever

October 14, 2008-February 12, 2018

 

 

 

February 16, 2018 From Mom

Oliver, you were absolutely the love and joy in my life.  I wanted a Pomeranian puppy more than anything.  Your dad and I searched everywhere for the perfect one.  One day, your grammie Ree sent me a picture of you in the pet store at Chapel Hill mall.  I begged your dad to take me to meet you.  We fell in absolute LOVE with you.  You were pricey but your dad wanted to make me the happiest girl on earth so he bought you as my Christmas present.  We brought you home and have spent the last 10 years loving you.  You have been with me everywhere.  All the places I’ve lived, all the car rides and road trips  we have taken, trips to the lake, trips to the beach, trips to the park, and so much more.  I’ve snuck you into so many hotels and resorts because where I went, you went.  You were the BEST snuggler.  You always knew just how to cheer me up when times were tough.  It could have been the worst day, but you would be at home waiting for me with your tail wagging ready for a big hug and kiss.  You were my lap dog.  I treated you like my human baby because you were my baby.  I cherish every moment with you.

I have dreaded this day for years.  Even the thought of losing you in the past brought tears to my eyes.  I’m so sorry you have had all the medical issues.  We have been with you through each one and would pay anything to fix it.  We thought this time was just another vet visit that we got you to before it was too late but turns out it was just your time.  I’m so glad you waited until you got home with me to take your last breath.  You knew where you wanted to go and that I had to be with you.

My heart will never be as full as it was when you were alive.  I will live each day missing you and thinking of you.  Everything I do, I will think, I wish little O could be here with us because that’s how you grew up, always with us.  I miss the snuggles, the honks, the bolts, the spins, the eye boogers, the snorts, the farts, the stinky breath, the seal feet, and just your overall presence because you were the MOST loving and loyal dog to me.  The loss of you is going to take some serious time to get over, and we will never fully be over it.

We are so glad you got to meet baby Lila.  You loved her.  You were so protective of her.  You would cry if she cried…and you NEVER cried.  You would growl at us if we got too close to her face.  All along we thought you’d be protective of me when she came, but you wanted to protect her.  I’m so sorry if you ever felt like attention was taken from you.  Please know that was NOT our intention.  We welcomed a new member to our family and there were a lot of changes but our love for you never changed.  We will continue to live thinking of you each day.  We will tell all your glorious stories to Lila because you were part of each event in our lives.  We love you with all our heart and soul, and we hope that you are in doggy heaven “bolting” around with your bones and ropes eating all the best treats there could be.  You are our forever love, little O, Ollie, Peanut, Oliver Bartlebee Robinson, our fur baby.

Love,

Your Mom ❤

 

 

What is it about getting my baby to sleep that just melts my heart?

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My wife asked me this morning if I minded if she went to a yoga class with a friend of hers. I told her of course I don’t mind go ahead and have fun. I will never EVER ask Nicole to not go do something she wants to do for herself. As far as I am concerned she has earned the right to leave the house to go do whatever she wants, whenever she wants.

 

The reason for this opinion is that outside of any unusual circumstances the mom spends 99% of the time with the baby. As a dad at times I feel useless because Lila relies on her mom for so much, and on me for so little. I know this will change as she gets older, but when a baby is breastfeeding she gets that instant and amazing bond with her mom, and the dad is just kind of an afterthought. So for how much my wife has to do to take care of our baby, ON TOP OF still working full time, taking care of all her usual jobs around the house, and taking great care of me LOL –  yea I think she has earned the right to go to yoga anytime she feels like it.

 

BUT I won’t lie to you good people. I will never lie in my writing no matter how personal it is. When my wife wants to leave the house, and I smile and say of course go have fun, on the inside I AM TERRIFIED!

 

This tiny little baby. This sweet little innocent angel, can turn in to a nightmare for a dad with no boobs. Boobs are the key to a breastfeeding baby’s happiness. Not hugs, not kisses, not toys, BOOBS, and we as dads are not blessed with them. Sometimes when I’m home alone with Lila it’s smooth sailing, but other times the girl just wants her momma and nothing else will satisfy her. In these situations I usually just have to endure her screaming and crying and hold on tight until my backup arrives.

 

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So Nicole leaves for yoga today and I finish feeding Lila her gross blended concoction I’m not really sure what it was? I think a mix of bananas and breastmilk and rice. We watch a little TV, I put her in her baby carrier and we goof around a little bit and take some funny pictures. All was going well , and then it began. She started rubbing her eyes which is always a sign of a sleepy baby. The rubbing of the eyes is usually accompanied by whimpering and/or crying until she gets the comfort of moms boob in her mouth, which often times puts her to sleep instantly.

 

With no mom around I knew I had to take action immediately. I took her out of the baby carrier and started walking her around the house. She loves when I do laps around the fireplace with her or as we call it “Walk the Babyapolis 500”. Lap after lap I walk and suddenly after only about 5 minutes she buries her little face in to my neck and passes out.

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It’s at this point that my heart is officially melted. I honestly get so emotional in this moment, every time it happens. My heart just fills with happiness it is so hard to explain. I keep walking laps feeling so loved. I smell her warm hair and listen to her breathing. There is no feeling in the world like this. This little tiny girl loves me and trusts me so much. I am her dad and she knows it. She knows that I am here for her now and I will be here for her forever.

 

It is in this moment that as a man you understand what the love a dad has for his daughter really is. It’s a truly in-explainable feeling and I wouldn’t trade it for the world.  I sit here writing this as I watch her sleep, and I realize how blessed I am to have this healthy happy baby, and how much I cant imagine life without her.

 

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For all the tough times raising a newborn brings, all the sleepless nights and tired days, all of the money that having and raising a baby costs.

 

This is the moment that makes it all worth it.

 

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Thanks for reading!

~Sean Robinson

OK, Which One of You Farted?

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Am I the only one who was raised by his mother to believe that girls didn’t fart? Please shoot me a comment or email I would really like to hear some other opinions on this. I  literally grew up with my mom telling me that girls just didn’t fart. She wasn’t kidding either she was dead serious, and I believed her. My mom never farted around us, in fact I still don’t know if I have ever heard my mom fart. I don’t think I want to hear my mom fart, even though it would be hilarious, but still you get the point. I think growing up my sister definitely farted, so maybe my belief growing up was that girls farted, but women didn’t.

 

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You know who does fart though- more than anyone? BABIES. Specifically the sweet little innocent one pictured above. This girl can fart so loud it shakes the entire couch. HOW on earth is a tiny little baby able to produce a fart so loud it sounds like its coming from a full grown adult? I mean of course its funny I am just so perplexed on how it’s possible for such a tiny human to release such a sound.

 

You know what’s NOT funny though?

 

THERE IS A MYSTERY FARTER SLEEPING IN MY BED.

 

There have been several nights where I was sleeping, and I suddenly woke in a panic believing there was an earthquake, only to quickly realize that we live in Florida and it was not an earthquake, but the mystery farter striking again.

 

I have three main suspects, as only 3 individuals with the ability to pass gas sleep in my bed.

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Suspect Number 1- Oliver Bartlebee Robinson – 6 Inches Tall- Auburn Hair

 

It could be suspect # 1, but I used my detective skills and quickly discovered that he does not have “buttcheeks”.  I am going to have to rule him out on the grounds of an inability to emit anything more than a “SBD” or Silent But Deadly Fart.

 

I believe the guilty party has to be either suspect # 2 or suspect #3.

 

 

*Suspects Number 2 and 3 Pictured Above*

 

 

Look at the photos above taken on two separate nights. These two beautiful girls APPEAR to be sleeping so innocently, but one of them is the mystery farter. Its funny almost every single night they sleep in the EXACT same position as each other. Lila must see her mom and just know like “Hey that must be how I am supposed to sleep.” So when I wake up to a bed rattling fart and look over to see these two sleeping in the exact same position how am I supposed to know who the guilty party is?

 

Based on my previous knowledge that women don’t fart, and babies fart A LOT I am going to have to give my wife the benefit of the doubt here and assume it was baby Lila, BUT it is also possible that women have been using baby farts as their cover for years.

 

I guess the world may never know.

 

 

 

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Thanks for reading!

~Sean Robinson

The Day I Found Out Women are Tougher Than Men

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This is a pretty embarrassing story. This is a story that makes people look at me when I tell it with a look that says, this guy can’t be serious! How can you call yourself a man? How are you ever going to help get your wife through the labor process!!!

It started out as a normal day. My wife Nicole and I were leaving work a little early to go to the doctor for some tests. She was two months pregnant with Lila at this point, and not much had changed in our lives yet. Nicole was really nervous because today was the day of her first blood draw. A woman has to get her blood drawn many different times throughout the course of a pregnancy. In my opinion this was one of the worst parts of the whole pregnancy! Nicole HATES needles. I felt absolutely terrible for her because I hate needles too! Though I must be honest I was secretly relieved that she was the one that had to deal with the needles, because if it was me that had to do it, we may not have a baby right now. BUT I put on my tough guy act the whole way to the doctors office telling her things like “It wont even be bad just look away”, “Just remember we are doing this for the baby”, and my personal favorite, “If I could trade places with you I would, but unfortunately you have to be strong and do it for both of us”.

 

The time was here. The nurse put on a fresh pair of latex gloves and started setting everything up. The crinkling of the needle in its little package alone was enough to give me the heeby jeebies, but I had to remain strong for my wife. After all she was the one who had to go through this ordeal as I stood by helpless. I encouraged her once again saying things like “Just look away and hold my hand”, and “Oh is that it? The needle is tiny you aren’t even going to feel this”.

 

On the outside I appeared strong and confident, but on the inside I felt like a 5 year old girl about to get her ears pierced. Meanwhile Nicole sat there cool as a cucumber, arm out, vein ready to be invaded by razor sharp stainless steel. When the process began Nicole’s demeanor never changed. She sat there as blood was removed from her body, not moving or making a sound, just breathing and doing what had to be done for her baby. Women are truly amazing.

 

I held her hand as I watched. I know watching is bad. Everyone knows not to watch, but I had to. I was caught in a trance. As I watched the cherry red blood exit her arm and fill the first vial I remember thinking “This isn’t so bad”. By the third vial I was completely locked in. It was like looking at a horrifying accident on the side of the road. You know you should look away but you can’t. As the 6th vial began to fill I remember thinking to myself “Something is wrong here”. I began to feel queasy as if I was going to vomit. I knew I couldn’t let her see how I was feeling because If I looked sick, then she would know that her support system was falling apart right in front of her.

I had to stay strong, or at least appear to be strong. I knew I had to find something, anything in that room to distract my mind from what was going on in front of me. I was finally able to pull my eyes off of the needle in her arm and lock them on a poster hanging on the doctors office wall. It was a giant picture of the female anatomy. I began to read the words and attempt to memorize them- anything to stop the feeling in my head and stomach screaming at me to find a trashcan to run to. Cervix, uterus, fallopian tubes, fimbriae, ovaries, Bartholin’s glands…DARKNESS.

 

The next thing I remember is Nicole’s sweet voice saying “Sean are you ok?” It sounded far away. It came with a strange echo. Almost like an angel was speaking to me from a thousand miles away.  I was dazed and confused, and still trying to act like I was the confident support system in this situation. I responded by saying “Yea I’m fine what do you mean?” It was then that I realized I was laying on the floor with a trashcan knocked over beside me.

 

If you hadn’t already figured it out, yes, I PASSED OUT COLD…Fainted, collapsed, blacked out, fell unconscious! I went down like a six foot tall sack of potatoes, hitting my head on the wall and the trashcan on the way to the floor.

Nicole still had the needle in her arm as she helped me up off the floor with her free arm. The nurse advised me to lay on the exam table, and just like that I was no longer here as my wife’s support system, I was here as a Co-patient!

 

The GOOD NEWS is that my wife is AWESOME and we have been laughing about that day ever since. Every time we went to the doctor after that somehow every nurse knew who I was and roasted me as I walked down the hall. “You aren’t going to pass out on us again are you?” “Maybe you shouldn’t be in the room for this” “Do you need an apple juice before we start?” Nurse humor is great.

 

It turns out that I had not had time to eat much that day so my glucose levels were extremely low. That is why I ended up getting dizzy and passing out.

The moral of this story is that if you are going to give blood, or watch someone give blood, NEVER do it on an empty stomach!

ALSO, Women are incredible. The way women are able to over come some of their greatest fears like its nothing, all for the love of a baby that is not even born yet is incredible.

That was the day that I learned the hard way, that women are way tougher than men.

 

Follow me on instagram for more content @SeanRobsWorld

 

Thanks for reading!

 

~SeanRob

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Lila is born, and the Journey Begins

Wow where do I begin. I have never considered being a blogger before, or blogging…or writing for any reason other than to get a passing grade in school. Usually a C + or better was good enough for me. Just good enough to keep me from getting grounded, and to keep me eligible for sports. Not good enough for my mom, but good enough for me. In high school at least. I will admit in college I got my act together, and my GPA way up. Due in large part to the fact that the girl I had my eyes on in college had already graduated, and I wanted nothing more than to impress her, graduate ahead of schedule so that we could begin a life together, and make her mine for life. I suppose that’s where our story begins. (More on this later)

The reason I decided to become a “blogger” AKA write my thoughts instead of just think them, is because my wife and I recently just had our first baby. She is a beautiful girl named Lila Marie, and she is half my world. I know the saying is supposed to read “My whole world”, but in my world my beautiful wife has earned at least half. Probably more. I decided to journal my thoughts and stories because I never want to forget a moment that we share with this little nugget. Wow blogging is actually really easy. I wrote this in about 5 minutes and I am actually MAKING myself stop writing. Who says gym teachers cant be (Good?) writers.

Follow my blog to get first hand storytelling of what it is like to be a new dad. Lila is only 7 months old and I already have more stories than I can count that are beyond hilarious. There are so many MOM BLOGGERS, and trust me I have so much respect for moms, but I think its time a new dad showed the world his side of the story.

Follow me on instagram for more content @SeanRobsWorld

Thanks for reading!

~SeanRob

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